Ha Ha Ha Very Funny

Okay I have no idea what Refundcents.com is. I even checked the site and I'm still not sure. All I know is people there like to buy a lot of one thing.

But apparently they saw my toilet paper blog because I've gotten so many coupons for toilet paper in my fanmail all sent c/o Refund Cents. 

So let me clear this up. When I said this should last me about a week, I was joking. This will last much longer. I will not be shopping for toilet paper for a very long time. I don't want to stock up. Besides I don't even use toilet paper. (I use those wipes. They're awesome.)

So although I appreciate the sentiment, I don't need anymore coupons. Thanks anyway.

P.S. Some of those coupons were already expired when I got them.

We love these

They are marshmallows. Or at least marshmallow-like treats. 

And they claim to be "vegan." But how can you really tell? 

Because if you look at this symbol, it seems like they don't quite understand what "vegan" means. 

100% vegan. And now with real rabbit.

Culprit II

Apparently there is a mystery about how the bottle ended up there in the first place. 

The truth is that there is a window ledge above that toilet. And I had set the bottle and it's top there to dry. I think the wind blew it into the toilet when we were having some blustery winds about a month ago, much like the winds we're having today actually.

I better go make sure the toilet lid is closed...

Holy Cow Followers!

I just noticed my followers just double in a few days. 

Is it the ew.com thing?

That's crazy.

The Culprit

We've had a clogged toilet in the bedroom for a while and we finally got around to getting a plumber to the house. 

Beth had left messages with a couple but no one ever called her back. Then a plumbing van passed us on the road. I told her to catch up and grab the number. This time we didn't mention the toilet at all. (That was my theory, get him to call you back first,  then tell him it's the toilet. Because even a plumber doesn't want to work toilet duty - or doodie). 

I had a feeling it was this travel sized bottle because I came across the cap and could not locate the bottom at all. 

The plumber had to remove the toilet because the snake wasn't working. I had bought my own snake to try to DIY the clog but I had no luck so I figured this was going to be the case. I wanted to remove the toilet myself because I had read the instructions how to do it on the internet but Beth wasn't going to let that happen.

SO looking up the bottom of the toilet we could see that we had a bottle face down against the bottom of the toilet. It moved all the way down around the curve in the toilet. (I might have helped it get there when I was trying to snake it. ) But it wasn't making the last turn.

What we finally decided to do was find a wire hanger. 

By the way, do you have any idea how hard it is to locate a wire hanger in this day and age? Everyone has plastic now. I think it's a conspiracy started by the tow truck guys. The fewer wire hangers in the world, the more we need them when we lock our keys in the car. 

So the plumber heated up the hanger end with his blow torch in an effort to get it to burn through the plastic and then when it cools it will be stuck inside the bottle and he could try to pull it out. 

That part worked but it still wasn't coming out. So he figured to try to push it out the other way. Still nothing.

Man is this story as suspenseful for you? 

So with me holding the toilet he worked the bottle back and forth until presto it popped out. I knew it was that bottle all along. 

I love working in the studio

For me, the coolest sets on this show are the ones we build.

(as'-dûrt)

Sometime when you go to the movies you get that Coca Cola slideshow where you might get a film production vocabulary word (like "gaffer") with the definition.

Well I heard one on set that Coke will never show you. 

See when you shoot two people talking to each other you usually shoot a wide shot. 

And then you cover the conversation for each actor. 

Now when you shoot someone for their close up, you can shoot them clean. 

But it usually looks better if it's a little dirty. You keep a little piece of the other guys shoulder in the foreground, which creates a better sense of... space? 

Usually the finished scene will incorporate a mix of both dirty and clean shots. 

So sometimes a director will have the camera operator "keep it dirty" or "dirty it up." 

But the other day because one actor was standing while another was seated. 

And the director let the camera guy know that he wouldn't mind a little more "ass dirt" on it. 

Ass dirt - n. A piece of out of focus rear end to be used in the foreground of an "over the shoulder" shot.

Ending Wet

Remember when I was "starting wet?"

Well now that "316" aired I can finally post these photos of that day.

I was in the water pretty much the whole time I was at work. 

And I was so good at pretending to drown that I actually swallowed a lot of water. 

But because we had a lot of rain at the time, the water was pretty clean. 

So luckily I didn't get sick. 

I did grow a second head though.

I can't believe this thing works

When I was at my parent's house over Christmas I had a bad reaction to a deodorant I used there. So after I came home I started using this crystal deodorant. I tried it expecting it to fail. There was no way a hippy product like this could handle the "I'm starting to smell like my dad" odors that have been emanating from my arm pits.

But surprisingly this thing works. 

And it works well. 

It's a salt crystal. All you do is wet it and rub it on your pits and presto! you don't stink. I guess it's supposed to create a salty layer that prevents the bacteria from growing under your arms. Sounds hokey but this thing stands up even to hot Hawaiian sweat. And so far I've had no complaints and I've even asked people to take a whiff for the purpose of research, and I always get an "all clear."

And it's essentially a rock so this thing has been lasting me a long time. Apparently I bought this in the travel-sized section on a whim. Now it's taking forever to finish. All I want to do is buy an adult sized version but it's just not letting me. 

Friday Nights at Applebee's

At last Friday Night Lights is back on network television. Some of you might have confused it for an Applebee's infomercial.  I can't help but feel sorry for the show. It's so good but it has struggled to stay on the air. First it premieres this season on Direct TV. And the coaches daughter gets a job at Applebee's. And they run commercials for Applebee's during the break.

I guess this is the future of TV. I keep seeing more and more product placement designed to sell advertising in this era of TiVo.

It's funny. When TV was new, commercials were done live with the host. How different is that compared to what they try to pass on as health tips at Subway on The Biggest Loser? I guess that's just it. Back then it was obvious that they were doing a commercial. At least shows like 30 Rock still try to make a joke out of it. 

A HEARTy Breakfast

Happy Valentines Day everyone.

For breakfast I tried to make everything heart-shaped.

The bacon was the hardest.

Next year I think I'll cook actual heart meat. 

That way, it won't matter what shape it's in.

Sweet 100.

Well folks we have arrived at our 100th episode. And to celebrate we got a cake. 

And guess who made it. 

These guys.

It was awesome. I had mentioned how much I like Ace of Cakes before. They sent me a care package of Charm City Cakes stuff last year. So when I knew they were coming to town, I got in touch. I got to check out the kitchen they were working in over a Schofield Barracks army base. I shot a little bit of stuff for their show and I sneaked a peak of the original concept sketch. 

Check out this detail. 

And here's the Hurley figure.

(That's Bernard in the back.)

Couldn't wait for them to slice it. 

Thanks Duff.

It starts with a spectacular plane crash

That will change their lives forever.

Thanks for the plug Heroes.

Just kidding. But it would have been sweet to work with those guys if they did crash here.

Filipino Prisoners do "Thriller"

Okay I know I've been out of the loop for over a year, but have you all seen this? 

So my question is: How come we've never see THAT on Locked Up Abroad?

Well this should cover me for about a week.

See, I like to eat a lot of exotic food.

Actually we've been trying to make the last roll last because we got these coupons from the grocery store. So I refused to buy it without the coupons which I had been forgetting over and over again. 

So I finally grabbed all five coupons and bought the required packs of toilet paper for the discount. 

When I was checking out, the cashier only scanned four of the coupons I gave him. I told him that I was pretty sure I gave him five coupons. He didn't believe me. And he had already shoved them into the slot in his drawer, so he couldn't even check without a manager to open the drawer for him. I tried to explain to him that I would not have bought a fifth pack of toilet paper if I didn't have a coupon for it. (No one needs to buy that much. Not at once.)

So he called for the manager to open his drawer. And we waited. Now by this time there were people starting to line up behind me. The cashier apologized to them for the delay, but I knew SOMEONE in that group was thinking that the "guy from Lost was haggling over $1.00."

Which I was. But I knew I was in the right. The manager opened the drawer and there were five coupons in there. I got my dollar. 

Now was it much ado for so little return? Perhaps. 

But I just want to say in my defense: Safeway started this. 

They gave me the coupons to begin with. I was perfectly happy paying full price for my TP until I had their coupons stuck to my fridge. Mocking me. Daring me to pay full price.

I feel so disturbed

A wild pig showed up on set yesterday. And we noticed he had a wounded front leg. Now law of the jungle tells me that this pig is doomed. How will he be able to compete with the other wild pigs in the search for food? So when I finished work and was about to get into the van I tossed the pig the rest of my sandwich.

As the sandwich left my hand I realized, "Wait a minute! THERE'S HAM IN THAT SANDWICH!"

Turning back to the pig I saw no signs of the sandwich. This pig had no idea that I had just turned him  into a cannibal. He was just hungry. 

I will never be the same again.

Neither will he. 

Nunu eats heart healthy

I always leave a little oatmeal in my bowl and let the dog finish it. But today we made so much; Nunu got her very own plate. She didn't finish it though. Which means the worms get oatmeal too. 

Just one big happy family. 

Seen Bigger

I've finally harvested my first cucumbers. 

They came out a little small but... 

(Insert suggestive cucumber humor here.)

"C'est ce qu'elle a dit."

A Modest Request

Can we please agree on one form of 3-D? 

I'm just getting tired of having to get a new pair of glasses every time there's a new 3-D gimmick.

When I was a kid I had to find a 7-Eleven that carried the glasses that were red in one eye  and blue in the other so that I could get the full effect of Revenge of the Creature on KTLA.

Then there was the 3-D where one lens was just darker than the other one.

Then there was Captain EO. (Well that wasn't a problem they gave you glasses as you came in.)

But then we have "Real D" which some theaters charged for the glasses while others gave them out. And I've already discussed my issue with them on a previous blog.

And this last week I had to go find the glasses for the Super Bowl ads and the episode of Chuck coming up. These are blue and yellow. 

I guess it's just me. But when I find out I have to go hunt something down in order to better appreciate television, it creates stress. Hawaii gets things late sometimes. You never know if your stores are "participating." I don't need this stress. So if you still feel you have to use 3-D to tease us, can we agree on one? This way, I can keep the glasses in a drawer and grab them when I need them.