A wild pig showed up on set yesterday. And we noticed he had a wounded front leg. Now law of the jungle tells me that this pig is doomed. How will he be able to compete with the other wild pigs in the search for food? So when I finished work and was about to get into the van I tossed the pig the rest of my sandwich.
As the sandwich left my hand I realized, "Wait a minute! THERE'S HAM IN THAT SANDWICH!"
Turning back to the pig I saw no signs of the sandwich. This pig had no idea that I had just turned him into a cannibal. He was just hungry.
I will never be the same again.
Neither will he.
This may just be one of my favorite stories ever.
ReplyDeleteHahaha. I even shared it with my usually ill-tempered mother-in-law and we both laughed until we snorted.
ReplyDeletehehehe very funny : )
ReplyDeleteA pig on the set...does that mean that we will see a wounded wild pig in some of the next episodes of LOST? Maybe you should put the Text in Spoiler-tags.... ;)
ReplyDeleteIt's no worse than the content of the feed in factory farms - we pretty much eat cannibal pigs anyway...blech.
ReplyDeleteThat is the funniest thing I have read in a long time - thanks for the laugh!
ReplyDeleteContact the Conservation Dept of HI. and they will look for the wild Hog. An injured animal can hurt itself and maybe others. Thanks for this blog, man.
ReplyDeleteLOL. Poor little piggy ;)
ReplyDeleteAs a veggie I probably shouldn't laugh but I did!
ReplyDeleteJust wondered if there was any sort of wildlife rescue in the area who might be able to help him? I don't know (being a brit) what the status of piggies is there...are they native?
Are you sure it wasn't the wild boar that used to "stalk" and annoy Saywer in a past lost-episode?!
ReplyDeletehehe funny story :-)
take care
peace and love
xoxo
hahaha.
ReplyDeletepoor pig.
poor you. that would traumatize me. :)
Thanks for my morning laugh (at the pigs expense). Now I must get back to my Spam and eggs...
ReplyDeleteWow...the road to hell is paved with good intentions...maybe you just gave that pig what it needed to survive, and now that it realizes it's brethren is tasty and nourishing it is going to stalk it cohorts in their sleep and eat them! Then it will become a super strong super pig and one day it will save your life...and after it does your eyes will meet and your gaze will drift down to it's leg to see the long healed over scar...and you will realize that it's the ham sandwich pig! It will symbolically not eat you and turn around and wander into the jungle...and your life will be changed forever...
ReplyDeleteHope this doesn't lead to mad pig disease........... :)
ReplyDeleteha. once at ruby's in hollywood the pigeons kept running under my chair and table searching for crumbs so i tossed them a chicken strip not giving it much thought. as they gobbled it down i realized what i had done and felt so horrible.
ReplyDeleteNOOOO!!! Now he has "The HUNGER" and he will never be able to curb his desire for pig flesh... Maybe it's a good thing he's wounded, it might give the other pigs a chance to get away from him.
ReplyDeleteAwwww....Jorge, the truth is, I think they're cannibals anyway. If anything, you gave the poor thing an upgrade. ;o)
ReplyDeleteLOL that is too funny!
ReplyDeleteYeah, that's kind of weird.
ReplyDeleteI used to work at a farm and we would always feed the chickens hard-boiled eggs, it made me uncomfortable
erhaps eat the skin off your toe.
ReplyDeleteP for Perhaps
ReplyDeletePoor pig! but the story is very funny.
ReplyDeleteGreat blog, Jorge.
Regards from Spain!
Oh nooo! so funny though
ReplyDeleteROFL! Awww, you meant well!
ReplyDeleteI have a parrot that loves grilled chicken. Seriously. It's okay. :)
ReplyDeleteMy sister's African Gray (parrot) loves eating chicken!
ReplyDeleteIt's okay. My friend's mom feeds her pigs bacon. They love it.
ReplyDeleteTo Funny!!!!
ReplyDeleteI am sure the pig was happy inspite!LOL!
Just yesterday my coworker was telling me how she saw a pigeon with a chicken wing and thought "Dude! That's your cousin!!!"
ReplyDeleteSoylent green is PEOPLE!!!
ReplyDeleteFun blog, thanks for keeping it up!
Maybe if you feed him with more sandwiches, he'll eventually be able to make a special guest appearance on a Roger Waters concert... =)
ReplyDelete*ROFL* Thanks for the laugh, dude.
ReplyDeletePoor guy: wounded and corrupted.
ReplyDeleteUh oh... Now what will he do if he has to cross the Pali?
ReplyDeleteeew!!!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteWell at least your heart was in the right place.
ReplyDeleteAt least he will never "know".
Jorge,
ReplyDeleteI will never be able to do the childrens limerick 'this little piggy' ever again after reading your confession. :-)
lllmmaooo! You turned that pig into a cannibal!!! But don't worry, the pig will never know it.
ReplyDeleteScott's line was the best. Cheers!
ReplyDeleteohmy. i'm glad i found your blog.
ReplyDeleteWhat a funny story...I had a similar experience. We had pigs one spring and we fed them lots of our leftovers, and one time I gave them some potato soup that had ham in it and I didn't realize what I had done til it was already in their trough. Freaked me out a little too...
ReplyDeleteNow when it dies it will turn into ZOMBIE WILD PIG!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry you feel so disturbed, but that is just too funny! Thanks for the laughs!
ReplyDeleteHi Islands! I found you through Marianna's blog.Found her through Coffee Messiah, found him through Washing Without Getting Wet, etc...
ReplyDeleteGreat blog.
I eat mostly veg, so I kinda freaked when I read the piggie was fed ham, but God knows, factory-farming is waaaaaaaaay worse!
Keep writing!
Peace,
www.lisananetteallender.blogspot.com
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Look for me, Lisa Allender, at:
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poor pig =(( But the story is nice. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteToday the letter and pixx from you arrived! Thank you alot! It is too exiting to have a letter from you from Hawaii!!!
with love from Tanya Olkhova (Russia Moscow)
We all laughed too -- kinda hard not too, but I think it's really cool that you had such compassion for him. I have developed a great love for all animals. I don't even kill insects -- except sewer roaches. I figure it's an act of compassion, since they choke until they die in our air.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteWell, if you think about it, people still eat primates, birds of prey eat smaller birds (and vultures eat anything), and the domestic pig and the wild hog are not the same species, so one eating the other is just as bad as most other animals on the planet. And the other good thing is that swine are omnivores, so the sandwich was at least nutritionally valuable. Maybe this will make you feel better
ReplyDeleteTry not to worry too much about it...in the wild if they are desparate they will turn to cannibalism anyway.
ReplyDeleteMmmmm, ham. :)
That was very, very funny! Thanks so much for the laugh, you've just made my day!Disturbing as it is, I loved it. Now will that pig need years of psycho-pig therapy I wonder?
ReplyDeleteI once fed (gave to on a tray) a cheese and onion sandwich to my dad and inside it was one of my finger nails! I have yet to tell him that he is indeed now a cannibal! And I once bit my tongue, which kinda makes me one too!
ReplyDeleteAt least the wild pig will survive another day all because of your kind heart:)
Keep em coming Jorge. Great stuff:)
Cannibal pig...reminds me of the tagline of this bit of classic cinema: http://stuff.ubersite.com/1086356525284429143/1/pigs.jpg
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletesolent green is made out of ham!
ReplyDeleteJajaja!!! Poor pig XD
ReplyDeleteMaybe he eaten his mother...
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OMG! I almost peed my pants!
ReplyDeleteno worries dude. Terry O'Quinn probably just threw a knife at it later when no one was watching.
ReplyDeleteTerry = Locke = Terry
Nice gesture-Don't feel bad--It was able to eat and thats the important thing. Usually they are not real friendly when they get around people. I remember when we had a transmitter site for a radio station near Pearl City and the wild pigs (boars) sometimes trapped us in the transmitter building because they would come charging at us when we would try to leave. When they get loose in neighborhoods HPD comes out and shoots them. The local residents usually have a luau to make good use of the remains.
ReplyDeleteThat is kind of twisted/ironic lol, but in your defense, you were trying to help. :)
ReplyDeleteThat is absolutely hysterical... but I feel like I should be embarrassed to think it was funny. Poor wild pig.
ReplyDeleteBest.story.ever.
ReplyDeleteI laughed out loud. In my living room. Alone. Kinda makes me a nutter, but it's cool.
Great story!!
I wonder if the pig as it was eating the ham thought....hey.. this tastes like Arnold!
ReplyDeleteMaybe it wasn't his first time eating his own brand.
ReplyDeleteI did chuckle a little bit at this. I'm sure the pig put two and two together when he didn't see his brother when he got home.
Would this pig qualify as a "dummy"?
Doesn't cannibal acting mean "eater of human flesh"? I wonder what the word for "eater of pig flesh" is?
ReplyDeletePoor pig. Good story.
Even pigs love bacon. It's that good.
ReplyDeleteI just found your blog through a link from Cake Wrecks. This might be the funniest story I've heard in a while!
ReplyDeleteMaybe it's like when you eat foreign food: it's better to not know what you're eating. For the pig, ignorance is bliss. :)
*snorts* that was the awesomest thing I've heard all week. I actually had Dr Pepper come out my nose.
ReplyDelete*lol* At least it wasn´t hungry anymore!
ReplyDeleteThats funny!!!!
ReplyDeleteoh, my!!! that's so funny!!!
ReplyDeleteI wondered if you were funny like your character. Now I know. :-D
ReplyDeleteThat pig is no longer Kosher...
ReplyDeleteThis kinda random, but totally on subject...
ReplyDeleteThere is a video of Trey and Matt (the South Park creators) feeding a pig slices of bacon.
This makes my heart ache. :(
ReplyDelete
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