Foxy and I Shut Down the Ranch

In Molokai we stayed at the Lodge on Molokai Ranch. We got there Friday and as I poked my head in the bar for a second I heard someone call my name. I turned back expecting a devoted fan on vacation but sure enough it was Matt Fox of all people. He too was staying at the Ranch in their Beach Village. Sure we thought there was some chance that we'd end up staying at the same place if we ever visited Molokai because there aren't a lot of choices there. But we were pretty shocked to be there at the same time. In fact another member of our crew happened to be staying there as well. It was funny because the island was so small we'd run into each other the entire weekend. We'd be going up the hike and they'd be coming down. We'd be going into a parking lot as they were leaving. By the way at the Ranch instead of stop signs they have these:

Last week Thursday I found out from the guy on our crew that the Ranch was closing. By the time I was in hair and make-up Foxy told me the place had actually already closed. (Man! It only took minutes.) As it turns out the closing of the Ranch has something to do with the signs we saw EVERYWHERE that were against developing La-au Point. 

It just feels so weird knowing it's closed when we were just there. I mean what's going to happen to cats? We named them Dummy 

and Orngie. (He was orange.)

 And we would give them food off of our plates. Until some kid totally told on us to his parents. What a narc!

Forgotten Fruit

Upon arriving on Molokai we stopped in town for snacks to have during our stay. We bought this strange fruit on impulse at a natural food store. 

Here's what it looks like when you cut it in half. 

Inside the fruit is super sweet like the softest pear sprinkled with brown sugar.

 But the seeds were extremely hard. 

No clue what it was called. 

Not Phallic Rock

But I took a picture of it anyway.

It looked like it was part of a set. 

As Promised

This is Phallic Rock. 

It's supposed to make women fertile.

Hold on a second...

Manly Man Shows

Man do I love shows featuring men doing mean jobs. As I write this I'm watching Ax Men the latest in these shows where I see "green horns" that are a thousand time tougher than I'll ever be. (Thank goodness for showbiz.) One of the sickest loggers in this show is Jay Browning who lost his hand at the THUMB...

 and REFUSED TO CASH HIS WORKER'S COMP CHECKS.  

The show keeps threatening that someone is going to die or something. So in way it's like LOST.These men are fearless in the woods. The chop and cut with the sickest precision and they can walk across a fallen tree like it's nothing. 

I on the other hand am not so confident striding through the trees.

 

Yeah. Climbing up to take that picture was the easy part.

 

Not depicted was me crouching down on my hands and knees to get down. 

Deadliest Catch comes back in about two weeks. It's the original and still my favorite. I've already set my DVR to record the reruns that are going to be leading me up to the premiere. 

And man when is Ice Road Truckers coming back?!

The Least Favorite Bread in Moloka'i

On our hike to "Phallic Rock" (I'll save that story for later) I met a local woman who told us we had to try two things before we left Moloka'i:

We had to drink a "Mocha Mama" (check)

And try Moloka'i Bread.  

Moloka'i Bread I believed refered to the sweet bread from Kanemitsu's Bakery. 

(Later I heard about a thing they call "Molokai Hot Bread" which is also at the bakery and may have been what she meant.)

We drove to Kaunakakai and went into the bakery. There were tons of blue bags of bread on the counter. All of which had names on them. These were pre-orders. I got the feeling that coming here on Easter may have been a mistake. But what could we do? We were going home today. 

But I didn't know how heart-breaking it would be to be standing behind the person who got the LAST LOAF OF SWEET BREAD! 

Damn! 

I was in shock. 

I just had to leave. Getting anything other than the bread I had my heart set on would be "chasing." 

So we decided to drive as far away as we could. It would have been so much easier if they had run out an hour ago. Even fifteen minutes ago. But the lady in front of us? I started running through everything that slowed me down that day by just a minute. "Maybe if I didn't make that U-turn to park..." 

So we ended up driving all the way to Halawa Valley. Which was spectacular and got our minds off of things. 

Well what really got our minds off of it was fearing for our lives. The road to Halawa is quite precarious and becomes only one lane at the scariest parts. But then it was time to head back to the airport to make our flight. (Or so we thought, little did we know that our flight was going to be delayed for over an hour.) 

We passed through Kaunakakai one last time and we just HAD to try something from that bakery. So my girlfriend went in and bought the last bag of bread they had. 

This bag, it was sandwich rolls basically, was the last item in the whole bakery. The "lemon filled" in the Kanemitsu "donut box." And well...

Look I'm not going to review a bakery based on their hot dog buns. And now that I know they serve it hot at night, I guess I'm going have to plan another trip. 

Uh Boss? You're starting to scare me

Hey when did Disney get  into the produce business? I showed up at my grocery store to find Enchanted on the bags of apples and then the Toy Story bunch too. 

Is this really necessary? Does the mouse need his hand in EVERY pocket? 

"Coming soon from the corporation that brought you apples: Wall-E the story of a cute little robot who finds love. Don't miss the scene where he adorably eats an apple."