A blog by Jorge Garcia.

Friday, February 6, 2009

I feel so disturbed

A wild pig showed up on set yesterday. And we noticed he had a wounded front leg. Now law of the jungle tells me that this pig is doomed. How will he be able to compete with the other wild pigs in the search for food? So when I finished work and was about to get into the van I tossed the pig the rest of my sandwich.

As the sandwich left my hand I realized, "Wait a minute! THERE'S HAM IN THAT SANDWICH!"
Turning back to the pig I saw no signs of the sandwich. This pig had no idea that I had just turned him  into a cannibal. He was just hungry. 

I will never be the same again.

Neither will he. 

86 comments:

Newscoma said...

This may just be one of my favorite stories ever.

Kathy T. said...

Hahaha. I even shared it with my usually ill-tempered mother-in-law and we both laughed until we snorted.

Nene said...

hehehe very funny : )

Thomas said...

A pig on the set...does that mean that we will see a wounded wild pig in some of the next episodes of LOST? Maybe you should put the Text in Spoiler-tags.... ;)

C said...

It's no worse than the content of the feed in factory farms - we pretty much eat cannibal pigs anyway...blech.

Jenni Hunt said...

That is the funniest thing I have read in a long time - thanks for the laugh!

MissBeaHaven said...

Contact the Conservation Dept of HI. and they will look for the wild Hog. An injured animal can hurt itself and maybe others. Thanks for this blog, man.

Rebecca said...

LOL. Poor little piggy ;)

Sproggie said...

As a veggie I probably shouldn't laugh but I did!

Just wondered if there was any sort of wildlife rescue in the area who might be able to help him? I don't know (being a brit) what the status of piggies is there...are they native?

New Yorker wannabes said...

Are you sure it wasn't the wild boar that used to "stalk" and annoy Saywer in a past lost-episode?!

hehe funny story :-)

take care
peace and love
xoxo

Ali said...

hahaha.
poor pig.
poor you. that would traumatize me. :)

wharfrat said...

Thanks for my morning laugh (at the pigs expense). Now I must get back to my Spam and eggs...

electrictree said...

Wow...the road to hell is paved with good intentions...maybe you just gave that pig what it needed to survive, and now that it realizes it's brethren is tasty and nourishing it is going to stalk it cohorts in their sleep and eat them! Then it will become a super strong super pig and one day it will save your life...and after it does your eyes will meet and your gaze will drift down to it's leg to see the long healed over scar...and you will realize that it's the ham sandwich pig! It will symbolically not eat you and turn around and wander into the jungle...and your life will be changed forever...

Kara said...

Hope this doesn't lead to mad pig disease........... :)

the nobody said...

ha. once at ruby's in hollywood the pigeons kept running under my chair and table searching for crumbs so i tossed them a chicken strip not giving it much thought. as they gobbled it down i realized what i had done and felt so horrible.

Suzanne said...

NOOOO!!! Now he has "The HUNGER" and he will never be able to curb his desire for pig flesh... Maybe it's a good thing he's wounded, it might give the other pigs a chance to get away from him.

Please Type Legibly said...

Awwww....Jorge, the truth is, I think they're cannibals anyway. If anything, you gave the poor thing an upgrade. ;o)

BrianB130 said...

LOL that is too funny!

GaltsGulch said...

Yeah, that's kind of weird.

I used to work at a farm and we would always feed the chickens hard-boiled eggs, it made me uncomfortable

Scott said...

erhaps eat the skin off your toe.

Scott said...

P for Perhaps

Anonymous said...

Poor pig! but the story is very funny.
Great blog, Jorge.
Regards from Spain!

Anonymous said...

Oh nooo! so funny though

Irishcoda said...

ROFL! Awww, you meant well!

My name is Jodie. said...

I have a parrot that loves grilled chicken. Seriously. It's okay. :)

Movie Star Wife said...

My sister's African Gray (parrot) loves eating chicken!

Evonne said...

It's okay. My friend's mom feeds her pigs bacon. They love it.

Robbi said...

To Funny!!!!
I am sure the pig was happy inspite!LOL!

amy said...

Just yesterday my coworker was telling me how she saw a pigeon with a chicken wing and thought "Dude! That's your cousin!!!"

moon said...

Soylent green is PEOPLE!!!

Fun blog, thanks for keeping it up!

Tiago Duarte Dias said...

Maybe if you feed him with more sandwiches, he'll eventually be able to make a special guest appearance on a Roger Waters concert... =)

Unknown said...

*ROFL* Thanks for the laugh, dude.

Heather (a.k.a. Bella) said...

Poor guy: wounded and corrupted.

Kat said...

Uh oh... Now what will he do if he has to cross the Pali?

Meg said...

eew!!!

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jodi said...

Well at least your heart was in the right place.

At least he will never "know".

James Hernandez said...

Jorge,

I will never be able to do the childrens limerick 'this little piggy' ever again after reading your confession. :-)

whiterabbita said...

lllmmaooo! You turned that pig into a cannibal!!! But don't worry, the pig will never know it.

elainemarieg said...

Scott's line was the best. Cheers!

Shalina said...

ohmy. i'm glad i found your blog.

Erica said...

What a funny story...I had a similar experience. We had pigs one spring and we fed them lots of our leftovers, and one time I gave them some potato soup that had ham in it and I didn't realize what I had done til it was already in their trough. Freaked me out a little too...

redelf said...

Now when it dies it will turn into ZOMBIE WILD PIG!!!!!!!

Christina Bauer said...

I'm sorry you feel so disturbed, but that is just too funny! Thanks for the laughs!

Lisa Nanette Allender said...

Hi Islands! I found you through Marianna's blog.Found her through Coffee Messiah, found him through Washing Without Getting Wet, etc...
Great blog.
I eat mostly veg, so I kinda freaked when I read the piggie was fed ham, but God knows, factory-farming is waaaaaaaaay worse!
Keep writing!
Peace,
www.lisananetteallender.blogspot.com
www.practicewhatyoupeace.blogspot.com
Look for me, Lisa Allender, at:
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tanushka said...

poor pig =(( But the story is nice. Thank you!

Today the letter and pixx from you arrived! Thank you alot! It is too exiting to have a letter from you from Hawaii!!!


with love from Tanya Olkhova (Russia Moscow)

Shohom67 said...

We all laughed too -- kinda hard not too, but I think it's really cool that you had such compassion for him. I have developed a great love for all animals. I don't even kill insects -- except sewer roaches. I figure it's an act of compassion, since they choke until they die in our air.

Ricardo Castillo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ali said...

Well, if you think about it, people still eat primates, birds of prey eat smaller birds (and vultures eat anything), and the domestic pig and the wild hog are not the same species, so one eating the other is just as bad as most other animals on the planet. And the other good thing is that swine are omnivores, so the sandwich was at least nutritionally valuable. Maybe this will make you feel better

Stacy Disarrayed said...

Try not to worry too much about it...in the wild if they are desparate they will turn to cannibalism anyway.
Mmmmm, ham. :)

lostinphilly said...

That was very, very funny! Thanks so much for the laugh, you've just made my day!Disturbing as it is, I loved it. Now will that pig need years of psycho-pig therapy I wonder?

Jason Paul Tolmie said...

I once fed (gave to on a tray) a cheese and onion sandwich to my dad and inside it was one of my finger nails! I have yet to tell him that he is indeed now a cannibal! And I once bit my tongue, which kinda makes me one too!

At least the wild pig will survive another day all because of your kind heart:)

Keep em coming Jorge. Great stuff:)

Unknown said...

Cannibal pig...reminds me of the tagline of this bit of classic cinema: http://stuff.ubersite.com/1086356525284429143/1/pigs.jpg

Rachel said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
nomad said...

solent green is made out of ham!

Rachel said...

Jajaja!!! Poor pig XD

Maybe he eaten his mother...

Kiss from spain

Summer said...

OMG! I almost peed my pants!

Smithakins Photos said...

no worries dude. Terry O'Quinn probably just threw a knife at it later when no one was watching.
Terry = Locke = Terry

The Engineering Bureau said...

Nice gesture-Don't feel bad--It was able to eat and thats the important thing. Usually they are not real friendly when they get around people. I remember when we had a transmitter site for a radio station near Pearl City and the wild pigs (boars) sometimes trapped us in the transmitter building because they would come charging at us when we would try to leave. When they get loose in neighborhoods HPD comes out and shoots them. The local residents usually have a luau to make good use of the remains.

Miztification said...

That is kind of twisted/ironic lol, but in your defense, you were trying to help. :)

Colleen @AMadisonMom said...

That is absolutely hysterical... but I feel like I should be embarrassed to think it was funny. Poor wild pig.

Vonnie said...

Best.story.ever.
I laughed out loud. In my living room. Alone. Kinda makes me a nutter, but it's cool.
Great story!!

mazzy said...

I wonder if the pig as it was eating the ham thought....hey.. this tastes like Arnold!

ValMo said...

Maybe it wasn't his first time eating his own brand.
I did chuckle a little bit at this. I'm sure the pig put two and two together when he didn't see his brother when he got home.
Would this pig qualify as a "dummy"?

Unknown said...

Doesn't cannibal acting mean "eater of human flesh"? I wonder what the word for "eater of pig flesh" is?

Poor pig. Good story.

Whit said...

Even pigs love bacon. It's that good.

Allison Walton said...

I just found your blog through a link from Cake Wrecks. This might be the funniest story I've heard in a while!

Maybe it's like when you eat foreign food: it's better to not know what you're eating. For the pig, ignorance is bliss. :)

Unknown said...

*snorts* that was the awesomest thing I've heard all week. I actually had Dr Pepper come out my nose.

Line said...

*lol* At least it wasn´t hungry anymore!

Keeper of the Skies Wife said...

Thats funny!!!!

Chrys said...

oh, my!!! that's so funny!!!

Momof4 said...

I wondered if you were funny like your character. Now I know. :-D

BigMonya said...

That pig is no longer Kosher...

As Always said...

This kinda random, but totally on subject...

There is a video of Trey and Matt (the South Park creators) feeding a pig slices of bacon.

Flaknitter01 said...

This makes my heart ache. :(

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